Have you ever tried painting with a previously used paintbrush? Though the brush may have been cleaned, it is still stiff and the bristles tend to bunch together. The paint does not go on as smoothly as it does when applied with a new paintbrush. The same is true when we try to approach a new day with the dried residue of yesterday’s mistakes still on the paintbrush of our minds. A new paint job will always look best when the surface is scraped clean and a new paintbrush is used to apply the paint.
We are only doomed to repeat our past failures when we carry them with us into our future. Even when we are thinking about how we want to avoid a past failure, it becomes inevitable to repeat them because our attention is on our failure. It is fine to spend a short time looking at where things went awry in order learn and adjust, but too often we tend to dwell on the past. The mistake dominates our awareness and controls our thought energy, even though our thought is focused on NOT repeating it. Though our conscious mind is working hard to paint a new picture, much of our future is manifest in our subconscious mind and, unfortunately, the subconscious does not process negatives.
Regardless of what we may want, we move in the directions of our focus. To illustrate, let’s say you step up to the first tee on a golf course and there is a lake along the right-hand side of the hole. Now, of course you want to hit the ball in the fairway but as you set up to hit, your eyes are drawn to the water and not the fairway. Likewise, the hazards in life always stand out as well. If you fix your stare on the water and tell yourself, “I am not going to hit it in the water,” the subconscious only recognizes “I am going to hit it in the water.” This, coupled with the fact that you have just sent the image of the water to your subconscious, creates the conditions to send your ball sailing into the water (pun intended).
Ok, so maybe you have never driven a golf ball, but if you have driven on the interstate then you have experienced a similar phenomenon. As you are driving, something on the shoulder draws your attention or maybe there is construction work and they have a cement barricade wall set up along the shoulder. If you allow yourself to focus on the car pulled over on the shoulder or on the temporary barricade for any length of time, the car tends to drift that way. You quickly realize that in order to drive straight ahead you need to focus your eyes straight ahead.
So what do we do to avoid focusing on yesterday’s gaffs? We have to wake up each day and clean the slate! Scrape off the old paint from yesterday so you can repaint the future based on the outcome you desire. We have to set our gaze daily in the direction we want to go, not where we don’t want to go or, worse yet, on the wrong places we have already been. The message you send to your subconscious must be focused on what you desire and not on what you wish to avoid. This is not to say that today will not have adversity, lakes or cement walls with which to contend. It just means our focus will not be on them.
It is not about having a perfectly clean slate today. We can’t be a virgin again or erase our past. But we can purify, cleanse and renew our thinking in order to see and create the optimal conditions for a new future. The important thing is to have a clean and fresh perspective. We must maintain a sense of hope that we can live today with new, healthy choices.
Former President Bill Clinton hit the nail on the head in a recent interview for Esquire magazine when he said, “I think what breaks people is not adversity; what breaks people is thinking that tomorrow is going to be just like yesterday.”
I think it is fair to say that we all want tomorrow to be better than today. No one wants to repeat yesterday’s mistakes. It is our nature as humans to seek improvement. It is only when we give into feelings of hopelessness that we sink into depression or despair and create the conditions in our mind that allow history to repeat itself again and again and again.
Here are a few tips to help you paint the picture of the outcome you desire:
1) Close your eyes and visualize the outcome you desire. Picture yourself achieving your desire in the movie in your mind. As kids, we all have the creative ability to visualize something with our eyes closed. The fact that we can dream should be all the evidence we need to know that we CAN visualize. Don't worry if you have trouble seeing a clear vision right away. It just takes practice. Most people stop visualizing after the first or second grade and are just out of practice.
2) Go back to a time when you achieved a positive result and remember what it “felt” like to succeed. Let this feeling sink in so that you can emotionalize as you visualize.
3) Write a short affirmation (or two) to confirm your ability to succeed. Make it in the present tense as if it is happening now. Say it over and over as you visualize your desired outcome, i.e. “I am confident and composed as I answer each interview question in a clear and concise manner.” Or “I am making a positive connection with the audience as I deliver my presentation with confidence and clarity.”
You can practice these steps anywhere and in a very short time. It is no secret that moments before Tiger Woods made the 15 foot putt to go into the playoff at the 2008 US Open, he had already made it in his mind’s eye. He expected it to go in. The crowd did too, so the energy and conditions were in his favor to sink the putt. Even Rocco Mediate, his challenger was caught by the TV camera saying, “He’s gonna make it.” Tiger did make the putt and went on to win the US Open in a playoff. Tiger has made a lot of key shots at key moments but he made every one of them first in his mind.
Remember, you don’t have to be Tiger Woods to envision the future you desire and you don’t have to be an artist to make today a masterpiece!
No comments:
Post a Comment